You’re What’s Wrong with Your Dating Life; Not Hookup Culture: Part 1

As I wrote this piece, it became a lot longer than I anticipated. So this has turned into a multi-part post. I plan to explore this issue completely, and then propose what I think the real issue is with modern dating. Here’s part 1:

Anybody who spends more than five minutes on social media knows that there is a hoard of unhappy singles that won’t hesitate to share the most recent meme or thought piece from Elite Daily, that is “so totally me!” or “so true tho”. Everybody has their reason for their jaded outlook on dating, but the most common denominator is the looming boogie man of “hookup culture”.

Whether it’s contempt for Netflix and Chill (which I’ve honestly never heard somebody use seriously unless it’s attacking the idea), Tinder, or condemning social media while grandstanding via social media, young people will never get enough of hating the current dating landscape for not catering to their preferences. I’m worried I might go blind if I see another article attacking hookup culture because my eyes will fall out of their sockets from rolling so hard.

Hookup Culture Has ALWAYS Been a Thing

Let’s start with “Netflix and Chill”. Why does everybody think that people meeting up to watch a movie as a front for sex is some new phenomenon? Ever since teenagers have had the freedom to choose their partners, this has been a thing!

Go back as far as the 50s, everybody’s Golden Age of Romance, teens went to the drive-in theater, Make Out Point (or whatever their variant was in their neighborhood). Do you think they cared about the grainy film or the “breathtaking view”? No! Don’t be naïve, teens just wanted an excuse to get in each others pants! Just because there wasn’t a silly term like “drive-in and chill” doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

The only difference between the 50s and now? Sex education beyond abstinence was a joke and single mothers were social pariah since there was living, breathing, proof that they had sex outside of wedlock. If Jane from down the block got knocked up, there were very little choices outside of a shotgun wedding. Spare me this narrative that all young people were morally sound in previous generations. They weren’t much different from the modern day millennial; they just cared more about covering up what was considered taboo.

Previous generations weren’t morally superior than today’s, at least not when they were young people. They were just better at covering up their shortcomings. If you don’t believe me, just a quick Google search of teen pregnancy rates from 1950 to the present day should back up my claim (I won’t go into the logistics of how many pregnancies from the 1950s were legitimately within wedlock, that’s another can of worms entirely).

Closing Thoughts

Before we continue in part 2, I’m not advocating for excessive sex and multiple partners, I’m just advocating for choice. Most people that know me know I’m pretty old fashioned myself, but I won’t for a second pretend that the dating landscape is a unique product of my generation. Rather, I will do my part as a single male to be a positive participant of modern dating. Complaining won’t make a difference.

Tune in for part 2 when I take on dating apps!